Plans, Plans, and More Plans

Alright, so here's the 411. (Yes, I've been dying to use that in a post since the beginning of blogging.) It was recently decided that I am hosting family for Christmas at my house. This is exciting and happy news... and also makes it necessary for me to finish the guest floor of my house. Three bedrooms, a bathroom and a family room--by Christmas.

So, in light of this new happy and stressful information, I will be cutting my blogging down to a maximum of once a week until after Christmas. I think if I don't, I will have zero minutes to work on writing, and I am desperate to work on Insomnia.

I think I will start doing a weekly post that includes some DIY tips as well as some fun mixed in. I will be reading your blogs, but I might not be commenting as much for a bit.

/update


if you know what that means, you deserve a cookie. :)

She's ALIVE! / Writers = Villains Post

Yes, I'm back. Other than a bad cough I can't seem to kick, I'm feeling much improved. May I give you one piece of advice about H1N1? Don't get it. All those silly people wearing masks didn't feel so silly last week. It. Stinks.

The End.

Now, time for the long awaited post about Villains/Writers.

















Think writers don't have anything in common with James Bond Villains? Think again. Villains are writers with slightly stranger habits. Stroking white persian cats while plotting total world domination, for example. Although, I do know a few writers who do exactly that.

Writers spend all their time trying to figure out how to make their characters lives harder. Sounds like a villain, no? What more can be thrown at them? Having the parents murdered, the wife run over by a train and the daughter stolen by robot ninjas isn't enough--writers must do more. They strive for complication on all levels.

Writers make nothing easy. (Ask any one of them who is simply waiting for a query response and you'll see what I mean.)

They strive constantly for control of every aspect of an entire world. They want to know what everyone is doing, when they're doing it, what they're feeling and who they're feeling it with. They want to make sure they have absolute control of every aspect at their fingertips. Can anyone say "Big Brother"?

The similarities are clear, the only difference I can think up is that writers (if at times begrudgingly) usually allow their characters to have a happy ending. Oh! and most writers don't end up dead or in prison at the end of their books--I think.

So what do you think? What James Bond Villain are you the most like?

10 Things I Learned This Week---Thanks To H1N1 aka Swine Flu

I am sick, so I'm interrupting my regularly scheduled posts for this list. Why? Because I'm on a serious amount of NyQuil and it sounded like a good idea at the time.

10 Things I Learned This Week---Thanks To H1N1 aka Swine Flu

1 - The sinuses are a great and under-utilized storage space. Seriously, the amount of crap I am currently carrying around in my head would easily fill two of what my husband calls my "unnecessarily large" purses.

2 - Lungs, when filled with gunk, don't work as well for other purposes.

3 - Fevers must have been thought up during God's day off. Some under-noticed assistant let the power go to his head and now we all have to pay for it.

4 - When anyone in the family gets sick, Mom gets sick.

5 - Dad locks himself in garage and avoids all contact with everyone until the danger has passed. Thus making him the most intelligent and least liked person in the family.

6 - Sick kids make the best cuddlers.

7 - IF you manage to get your night-time coughing under control, someone else in the family will start coughing loud enough to keep you awake.

8 - My house doesn't contain enough blankets or chicken noodle soup.

9 - The amount of hugs necessary in a given day is inversely proportional to how healthy my kids feel.

10 - Some women have that whole sexy, raspy thing going on when they're sick---I do not. I sound like Kermit---as a bass---it's not pretty.

Giveaway Results!

Thanks to everyone who participated! We ended up with 56 entries! Methinks this means I'll have to do another giveaway soon. :)

And now...

without further ado...

the winner is...

Emily!

Go check out her Kiddie Lit Book Blog.

Send me an e-mail with your address lady :) Congratulations! You'll love it!

Tomorrow I'll be posting the follow-up to this post comparing Literary Agents to Secret Agents. :)

The First Giveaway EVER!!! (Bom, bom, bom)

That's right folks, I'm about to make blog history. (For this blog, anyway.) This is my first giveaway--hold your applause til the end please, I don't want you to get tired.

One of my fellow Utah writer buddies, James Dashner, has a book that came out last week. I don't know if you've heard of him, but he's kind of a big deal--I'm sure he'd agree. His book is called THE MAZE RUNNER.

I just finished it yesterday and it does not disappoint. The plot is fast-paced and keeps you asking questions. He describes it as something like: Lord of the Flies meets Ender's Game. I think that is a perfect comparison.

It is also geared toward boys--as 99% of the characters are male--but it is the kind of story that many girls will be able to get caught up in it as well. I loved it! Thanks James!

I have an ARC, so being the supportive person I am, I purchased a hard cover one, had Dashner sign it and it's up for grabs on the blog. *Drumroll*

Taking my cue from a few giveaways James did on his blog - here are the rules.

1 - Sign up to follow me on twitter, facebook, blog and then leave a comment telling me you did it. Each is worth one entry to the drawing. If you are already following--you are, of course, supremely cool--and you still get the entries, IF you comment and tell me. :)

2 - If you advertise this giveaway on your blog = 1 entry. If you tweet about it = 1 entry. Just make sure to tell me in the comments.

3 - If you've read this or another book that you loved recently. Tell us what it was and what you liked about it. = 1 entry.

4 - You can do all of the above, all of the above you can do, and above are all that you can do. *This is my nod to Nathan Bransford for being hilarious--carry on*

This contest will be open until Sunday night at 9pm Eastern Time. Yes, I'm in Utah. But sometimes I pretend I'm in New York. If you have a problem with that = NEGATIVE 1 entry. ;)

Let the games begin! (By the way, if you clicked on the link in my blog to my blog, then I may or may not be laughing at you right now.)

How Literary Agents are like Secret Agents

On first appearance, one may not think that literary agents and secret agents have much in common.

One would be wrong.

Literary Agents (hereafter referred to as LA because--well because my hands are tired) have many traits that are shared with our favorite secret agent--Bond, James Bond.

Just as Bond likes to keep his identity a secret, LA try to go incognito as often as possible. When out in public, they don't want to be 'made' unless they're ready to announce it themselves.

Similar to Mr. Bond, LAs are always up for a good martini--shaken, not stirred.

Bond seeks hidden (or stolen) treasures. LAs frequently have to attend large gatherings of people and non-chalantly look for that elusive diamond in the rough--although most would prefer the diamond to be polished to perfection.

And the final similarity.

Bond has his damsel in distress to save. LAs have their aspiring authors. Not all of us are as pretty, but maybe we have more lights on upstairs. What? I said maybe.

So, you've seen the evidence. What do you think? Does being a Literary Agent take them one step closer to wearing tuxedos or formal gowns and packing a Beretta?

I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.

To Hibernate or Not to Hibernate. That is the Question.

In my family, on your birthday, you get to pretty much do whatever you want. And so, I am choosing to go into hibernation.

I've done this because, well, my body really wants to. In fact, this happens every year at this time. The first day my heater turns on, it's like it pumps some kind of sedative into the air. I get so very sleepy. Does anyone else have this problem?

I've started compiling and I feel I have some fairly substantial evidence that humans used to hibernate. I know science says no, but I think it should be revisited. Let me share my extremely scientific list with you:

1 - The whole sleepy when it's cold outside thing.

2 - Think about it: when do we have the big eating holidays? The winter--coincidence? I think not.

3 - Most people I know put on an extra layer of fat during the holidays, if we hibernated that would be gone by spring.

4 - Summer is when all the fun stuff happens.

I think you'll agree, it's pretty much irrefutable.

The good news is that while I wait for the scientists to get their acts together, I can begin my hibernation. How? You ask. Well, because they are currently preparing to do human hibernation trials.

The other upside is that it should make the "waiting on my agents who've requested phase" go by much faster. I mean this stuff is designed for space travel. It is the ultimate sci-fi writer's distraction technique.

So, I'll see you in the Spring!

P.S. Anyone mind if we reschedule Christmas?