In my family, on your birthday, you get to pretty much do whatever you want. And so, I am choosing to go into hibernation.
I've done this because, well, my body really wants to. In fact, this happens every year at this time. The first day my heater turns on, it's like it pumps some kind of sedative into the air. I get so very sleepy. Does anyone else have this problem?
I've started compiling and I feel I have some fairly substantial evidence that humans used to hibernate. I know science says no, but I think it should be revisited. Let me share my extremely scientific list with you:
1 - The whole sleepy when it's cold outside thing.
2 - Think about it: when do we have the big eating holidays? The winter--coincidence? I think not.
3 - Most people I know put on an extra layer of fat during the holidays, if we hibernated that would be gone by spring.
4 - Summer is when all the fun stuff happens.
I think you'll agree, it's pretty much irrefutable.
The good news is that while I wait for the scientists to get their acts together, I can begin my hibernation. How? You ask. Well, because they are currently preparing to do human hibernation trials.
The other upside is that it should make the "waiting on my agents who've requested phase" go by much faster. I mean this stuff is designed for space travel. It is the ultimate sci-fi writer's distraction technique.
So, I'll see you in the Spring!
P.S. Anyone mind if we reschedule Christmas?