10 Reasons to Wish You Didn’t Grow Up in the 80’s
1. Fighting the occasional intense urge to put on more than one pair of socks.
2. Resisting the instinct that headbanging makes any song cooler.
3. The sad knowledge that you shouldn’t ever wear your hair that high again.
4. Ignoring the desire to tie your shirt in some kind of knot any time the temperature goes over 65 degrees.
5. Understanding that minus all the hair and plus all the wrinkles, those Hairband idols are significantly less hot.
6. The realization that nearly every celebrity you looked up to back then was high as a kite 99.9% of the time.
7. The follow-up realization that most of them are now in AA or dead—neither state being remotely as entertaining.
8. You still wonder what happened to spandex.
9. The self-loathing that comes from still loving those power ballads even though you comprehend just how cheesy they actually are.
10. Being unable to discern between good hair days and bad hair days.
I decided I needed to make this list when I realized I suffer from all of the above, especially the last one. The other day, I decided my hair sucked and was boring so I cut myself bangs. Yes…bangs…with naturally curly hair.
Someone kill me now.
lol, too funny. Is it bad that I still go SEE these hair bands in concert (now mostly sans big hair)?
ReplyDeleteoh my!! I can identify.
ReplyDeleteOh, the beauty of a butt-rock power ballad. Want to throw our arms around each other's shoulders and sway to Poison's "Every Rose Has its Thorn?"
ReplyDeleteTawna
Tawna,
ReplyDeleteYes, yes I do. ;)
Bon Jovi, baby!
ReplyDeletePatty,
ReplyDeleteBon Jovi is the exception. He's still hot. :)
Ahh...my feet still crave the double socks, one slouching over the other. And my thighs being hugged by knitted leg warmers over a skinny pair of jeans. I so get your suffering!
ReplyDeleteSo...is spandex out? No!!!! LOL. =)
ReplyDeleteI can think of way more reasons to wish I did grow up in the eighties! Growing up in the nineties gave me an unrealistic view of real life.
ReplyDeleteJen,
ReplyDeleteJust rat them bangs and add 1 can aerosol hairspray.
All hail to the 80's tumbleweed bangs!
Oh, now the eighties weren't all bad. I kinda like all those cheesy ballads! :-)
ReplyDeleteIts too funny......
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Oh! I *heart* the 80's! Highlights for me: hot pink neon, "Always Something There to Remind Me", and "Safety Dance"! : )
ReplyDeleteSorry about the bangs. I still remember when I was styling my cousin's hair, circa 1989, and she wanted me to tease them up. I remember she kept telling me to make them bigger, "like a bush." LOL!
LOL, thanks for this post!! :)
ReplyDeleteHa! I really do miss by high hair. :)
ReplyDelete*laughing!* -- I was a teen child of the 70s ... lawd!
ReplyDeleteBut, I do remember tying my t-shirts in a knot in the 80's -haw!
LOL! I can relate to these! Especially the songs I hate to love.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'll add resisting the urge to tag my pant legs to the mix. :o)
LOL number 9 FOR THE WIN =)
ReplyDeleteAwesome list! I so remember wearing 2 pairs of socks . . . two different colors and put on in opposite order for each foot.
ReplyDeleteThose were the days. :)
Bangs and curly hair... yeah those have never gone together very well for me.
ReplyDeleteI have to say - I still love 80s music!
ReplyDeleteI have to say - I still love 80s music!
ReplyDeleteYes, Bon Jovi IS the exception. :) Bangs Jenn! You are a daring, daring gal.
ReplyDeleteI still love the power ballads and remember lip synching with them in my friends basement, we all had brushes and I think my bangs were so high in grade 12, they could give a small child shade.
ReplyDeleteI cut my bangs a year ago (curly hair as well), a straightener has become my friend.
Ok, time for my secret confession...I still own my original hair crimper. My daughter recentely dressed up for an '80's costume party and she was the best looking one there, if I do say so myself. Crimped hair and all!!
ReplyDeleteUh-oh, as a fellow curly-top I must say, "Bangs? What were you thinking?!" I hope they grow out quickly! :o)
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who still has the big hair from the 80s. People think she's eccentric and I say, no, she just has big hair. she's waiting for it to come back in style!
ReplyDeleteOh, the beauty of a butt-rock power ballad.
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